Yesterday, we stopped at my friend Shelley's on our way to the doctor and she let the kids have her leftover birthday hats and since my kids have such great imaginations, those hats have provided hours of amusement, including turning themselves into unicorns, clowns, and birds. Some photos to start your day off with a smile:
When Elijah and Sedaya first arrived, they couldn't pronounce "Mackenzie" and instead called him "MANckenzie" which we all thought was pretty cute and Mackenzie didn't mind it so it became a nickname for him and is very fitting since he is on his way to becoming a man. There have recently been a lot of changes in Mackenzie's life with the two biggest ones being that he has started school and has gotten a job. The picture above is him on his first day of school...grade 9. After always being homeschooled, we came to the decision this year to put him into school...basically, he got grounded from homeschool. At first, he was not happy with that and was very upset at the thought of going to school but we found a place that is a good fit for him and kind of a compromise between school and homeschool. The school he is going to is only in the mornings and there is a very small student-teacher ratio. They only do the core subjects and once their work is done, they can go home so they don't get any homework really which is very nice for us because otherwise I would have to be helping the other six with their schoolwork during the day and Mackenzie in the evenings. The teacher seems really nice and Mackenzie is doing well so far so I think it is a good thing for him. It was a super hard decision for me but once it was made and once we found this program for him, I was glad and knew that it was the right time for this for our family and for Mackenzie.
Mackenzie got his first real job. He is working at McDonald's, has finished his training and is working many afternoons a week. For a boy his age, he has a very good work ethic so I think he will do very well and he is already talking about promotions and raises and such so he is motivated. He is loving having a paycheque. He didn't particularly want me to take a picture of him in his uniform but I said "that's no problem...I'll just come into the store sometime when you're on shift and take a picture of you then" and with that threat, he happily posed in the kitchen!!!
He is still in Army Cadets and liking that. He has a weekend campout training coming up and always looks forward to those. He has recently taken a liking to skateboarding and has built himself a ramp in the Quonset. So there you have it...my oldest is fourteen and a half and growing up. It will be an interesting next couple of years as we navigate through the teens and he gets first his learner's permit, then his driver's license, decides what path he wants to take towards a career, builds on friendships, and forges a way for himself in the world.
The not so great news of today is that Gracelyn is REALLY sick. She has been for over a week now but the last three or four days have been bad to the point of her being up needing her Nebulizer every three hours or so all night long and me having her on the strongest of her meds. with very little improvement. I had originally scheduled an appointment with her Specialist (pediatric pulmonary specialist for those interested) for tomorrow because I had a babysitter lined up to come and take care of four of the kids and then I would only be taking her, Elijah, and Sedaya downtown for the appointment but Grace went downhill so quickly that I knew we had to get her there today or end up in the Emergency room and end up spending a few days at the hospital.
So this morning after a Social Worker came out to visit for our Ethiopia Post Adoption report (first of three required), I loaded the kids up and we ventured downtown for what would normally be at most a 20 minute thing. Well, her lungs were so bad that we had to stay at his office for an hour and a half while he gave her three treatments and then checked her again and my poor girl has to be put back on Prednisone for at least the next week as well as her four other medications...yuck! And we have to limit her time outside to almost nothing. But on the bright side, her doctor is awesome AND our community now has a new pharmacy with a DRIVE-THRU! I had the seven kids in the van with me, drove up to a window, dropped off six or seven prescriptions for Grace, came back ten minutes later to pick some of them up, again just pulled up to the window and the rest will be ready for me in the morning! How convenient is that! I realize that for the average person, this might not change their quality of life but when I have to get prescriptions filled for her at least twice a month and in the winter, I have to slug all the kids through the snow and then buckle them back into car seats, not to mention the whole being in the store with all of them, hoping they don't ask for some strategically placed candy or toy and have a public tantrum when I say no...this drive-thru pharmacy thing is like a dream come true for me!!!
Okay, as for the chicken...Grace's doctor keeps rubber chickens in his office and when Elijah saw one, he got excited, went over, picked it up by its neck, swung it around, made a hand motion of cutting off the neck, then pretended to pluck out the "feathers" (obviously a rubber chicken doesn't have feathers but you get the idea), showing me that you put them in the garbage, then he showed me that you break off the legs, cut it, cook it, and eat it. I think he may have sharaded skinning it too but I'm not sure on that. So it seems as if my boy has prepared chicken before from fresh to well, stomach. It shouldn't come as a surprise really since he is from a village in Ethiopia but it just struck me as funny that here we are, being so careful with him and he has probably used knives and cooked over an open fire and caught his own food! He was so proud to show me and even once we got home, he kept talking about it. Mark is now thinking that we should get some chickens so that Elijah can make us dinner!
Here are some random pictures that have nothing to do with any of this.
After weeks of not being able to sleep much and struggling every night just to get a few hours of sleep, Deanne (my sister-in-law) and I packed and got things ready around here until 3 a.m. and then went to sleep, only to sleep through the alarm! Can you believe we slept through the alarm on one of the most important days to wake up on time in my life?! But God had already made back-up arrangements for us so it all worked out. You see, the day before, we had thought that our flight left earlier and had arranged for my brother-in-law John to pick us up in time for that. When we realized that we had made a mistake on the flight time, we called John and left a message but he never got it so he arrived at my house early and banged on the door until he woke us. So we were not late for the flight, just a little frazzled! We took a West Jet flight from Edmonton to Toronto and then had a long time in the Toronto airport. I wouldn't want to judge all people in Toronto just by those that frequent and work at the airport but it was the most unfriendly, unhelpful place I've been to in my life. The Torontonians that we encountered there reminded me of what people say a stereotypical New Yorker is like. But that really has nothing to do with my trip so here are pictures of Deanne and I in the Toronto airport getting closer to the time of boarding our Emirates flight.
Discoveries on the flight from Toronto to Dubai:
-no matter how tired I am, it is still next to impossible for me to sleep on a plane
-I can go 14 hours without going to the bathroom!
The flight wasn't all that bad thanks almost entirely to the individual tv's with over 200 movies and hundreds on tv episodes available.
Dubai arpost is amazing! Its high ceilings, columns, fountains, mirrors, lights, and piped in music remind me of the fancy hotels in Vegas. So does the wave of heat that hits you when you walk outside. Here though, it is a humid heat, much like being in a giant sauna.
Going from the airport to the nearby hotel in a shuttle made me wish that I could see more of Dubai and really of this country. My Auntie Judy and Uncle Ken lived here in the United Arab Emirates for about five years and have told me stories of some of the things they experienced here and being here and seeing just this tiny bit made me so curious about the people here, the customs, the country and though I have certainly never before thought I would enjoy visiting a Middle Eastern country, I would have loved to have been able to spend a few days here. It is so beautiful.
After getting to the hotel, it was too late in the evening to see any of the city but Deanne and I walked next door and went to a Mexican restaurant that looked fun. I know that Mexican food in Dubai is kind of an oddity but traditional UAE food was not available near where we were so we thought, what the heck?!
I'm having fun with Deanne and much more relaxed and confident than I would be if flying alone. Our hotel room looks like a prison room or boot camp barracks but serves its purpose. We froze though because we couldn't figure out how to turn down the air conditioning and with the high humidity, things were damp and when added to the air conditioning, we were laughing about how chilled to the bone we were feeling in the hottest place I'd ever visited...outside, it was well above 40 degrees! We got very little sleep as there was no clock in the room (and neither of us have a watch) so we kept worrying about oversleeping and missing our flight in the morning, not to mention that I was a bundle of nerves knowing that I was only a three hour flight away from my children.
here is the only photo of me in Dubai:
No idea how to spell the title but our experience with this Amharic word began in Africa when Elijah would point to a man with hair shaved almost to balding and exclaim excitedly "loocha"! He would also try to push his hair down and forward and say "loocha" or point to Mark's hair and say it. We thought it meant "hair", then we thought it meant "haircut" or "shave" but have now discovered that it means "straight hair".
I very much want all three of my black children to be proud of their hair and their curls and to celebrate it. I try to take good care of Josiah's hair and use products on him specifically designed for black hair and have been doing the same for Elijah and Sedaya but Elijah was becoming very self-conscious of his hair as it grew a tiny bit longer and began to become a bit curly "farizz" and it was upsetting him. For now, I have decided not to make an issue of it and to let him have it shaved because my Amharic is not strong enough to explain to him what a blessing his curls are and how I love his curls and can help him manage them so until his English improves or my Amharic does, this is a good solution. My mom came over and shaved his head and I watched his little curls drop to my kitchen floor :( But, he is not obsessing in front of the mirror anymore and is happy with his "loocha".
On the day that marked the kids' one week home, Elijah was having a particularly homesick day so we made plans to go for Ethiopian food at a restaurant in Edmonton. That day, when I would see him starting to feel sad, I would remind him of the upcoming injera, doro wot, and shiro and he would break into a grin and start making eating noises. Food is such a comforting thing for most people and we all have our foods that just remind us of happy times or that bring us warmth and joy and for Elijah and Sedaya, just even the thought of familiar food brought them some peace. That night, we headed out to Langano Skies, one of Edmonton's Ethiopian restaurants. By the time we got there, I was a bit skeptical about how much just the taste of familiar foods could do since Sedaya had screamed all the way there because she didn't get to ride in Mark's vehicle (we have to take seperate vehicles because we only have an 8 passenger van but the kids who need car seats can't go with him since he doesn't have any) and Elijah was quietly crying for the same reason but as soon as we got into the restaurant and they saw the traditional Ethiopian artwork and smelled the food, their faces were plastered with perma-grins! My mom and dad met us there and I think were very surprised by how different Ethiopian food is. For those who don't know, it is served on a spongy, sourish flatbread called injera, which is also what you use to scoop up the food with - there are no utensils. Most dishes are a stew consistency. Elijah and Sedaya's favorite is the doro wat which basically means "chicken stew" and comes with drumsticks. Watching Elijah eat a drumstick is hilarious. When he is done, there is nothing left but the bone and usually he has even bitten than in half! When this child eats food he loves, he gets so excited and makes quite a production of the event...very fun to watch!
The food did the trick for putting a smile on Elijah's face. Of our non-Ethiopian kids, Josiah is the only one who liked the food so we had to feed four of the kids pb&j when we got home!!! (I think my mom and dad probably had to have a snack once they got home too!) After the meal, I went and spoke to the owner and asked her if she spoke Amharic and if she would mind coming to the table to speak to the kids for a few minutes. Sedaya was tired by then and not interested but Elijah lit up when she began speaking to him. Later, her husband came and spoke to him too. It must be exhausting for him to listen to English all day and have to try and figure out what is being said so I am sure it was a welcome relief to be able to have a relaxing conversation with someone.
The next morning, we got a babysitter for the other kids and Mark and I took Elijah and Sedaya to Humpty's in Sherwood Park - kind of a strange place to take them, right? Well the reason we went is that earlier in the week, Mark had gone there for coffee and discovered that the new owners are from Ethiopia and speak Amharic and one of them offered to translate for us if we wanted. Again, the kids lit up to hear someone speak to them with words that were familiar and they both enjoyed the time there. Mark are I were able to get a few answers to some questions that we had for the kids. As we were leaving, she gave us a huge container of Berbere spice and suggested that I add it to my sauces for the kids because the taste would remind them of home and would make the Canadian food more to their liking. Guess what? It works! There was a pasta I made for lunch a few days later that they didn't like and then I told them that I was adding some Ethiopia to it and sprinkled a bit of berbere into each of their bowls and they loved it!
Ok...there is so much to write so I have posts scheduled to appear over the next few days (I have not posted due mostly to the fact that my laptop has died - I am typing at this moment on Mark's computer, which I hate - no offense to Mark but his computer just isn't mine) Before I get into how the new additions are adjusting or transcribe my journal from Ethiopia, I just have to post this story from our first week back because it is a great example of how that week was. I wanted things to be so perfect for Elijah and Sedaya and for us to be working on attachment and making sure they felt safe but I had this ear infection and nasty cold and wasn't sleeping much due to jet lag and I was quickly discovering that life around you doesn't stop just because you've had this big change happen...Gracey still got my cold which triggered her asthma, Mackenzie and Jonah are still teenagers who wanted to have friends over and get back to normal, Mark had to immediately go back to work, laundry still piles up, bills still need to get paid, and as much as I tried not to, errands still needed to be done... so our big attempt at staying home all the time and never having any visitors was more short-lived than expected.
We had been home with Elijah and Sedaya for five or six days and I had managed not to leave the house during that time and even with all the aforementioned things popping up, I was still determined to be doing things the "right" way where attachment goes and of course the big one being - I would NEVER be leaving them with a babysitter or anyone other than Mark or I for many months to come.
The little five were riding their bikes on the deck and Eliana who is four but rides a two wheeler very well was riding fast and looking back talking to Josiah and rode right THROUGH one of the glass panels on the deck, shattering the glass and landing on the pile of broken glass on the concrete below! The other kids saw this happen of course (so much for not traumatizing the new ones!) and I was feeling a bit panicked by all the blood. At first, it was one of those things where she was bleedng from so many places that you couldn't tell where the blood was coming from and it took a few moments to figure out that none was from her neck or face and that it wasn't life threatening. Jackie just happened to be over at that time (the odds of that are so slim so I am very thankful that God provided another adult at the right time) so I had no choice but to leave the other kids with her while I wrapped Eliana in a towel and drove her to a doctor (so much for NEVER leaving Elijah and Sedaya with anyone, not to mention that to them, Jackie was a complete stranger!). I figured that the kids would only be with Jackie for 15 minutes tops though because I would get Mark to come home and be with the kids until I got back BUT little did I know that Mark had gone out for a late lunch with one of his brothers and forgotten his cell phone on his desk at the office so it was probably almost an hour before he got home after I had FINALLY gotten ahold of him.
Even though Eliana had dozens of little cuts on her body, there were only three that required stitching, the palms of each hand and just below one of her knees. Those of you who know Eliana will not be surprised to know that she had stopped crying by the time we pulled out of the driveway and only whimpered when they were putting the freezing needles in...she is one tough little girl! The stitches were removed yesterday and all looks well. My heart has returned to its normal rate and all is well but after that and a bunch of other indications that the cocooning was not working out, we have mostly scrapped it and have been going out with the kids and are going to start inviting visitors over again. Here's a picture of Eli standing near the panel she went through and displaying her fixed up hands and leg.
I wanted to share with you something that I wrote to a few close friends in the early days after our adoption agency's bankruptcy when Mark was preparing to leave for Ethiopia and the future of Elijah and Sedaya was up in the air.
"We are exhausted, worried, and overwhelmed but in the moments when it all seems too much, we are reminded that God has Elijah and Sedaya in His hands and that the timing of this is His. We know now that God made a way for us to get through court and legally become their parents so quickly because He knew that this would happen and had planned all along that they were to be our children. We are believing that they will come home.
The other morning at sunrise I was outside in our backyard and in one moment was marvelling at the beautiful land that God has blessed us with and in the next moment broke down in tears when I thought about the possibility that I would never see Elijah and Sedaya playing on the swingset or running on the lawn with our other kids but then claimed the promise that He put these kids in our hearts long ago and that one day I will see them laugh and play here. Please continue to pray that all of our children will be safe, that our documents will get to Nairobi soon and that we will be able to be together as a family here in Canada within a few weeks."
I guess the pictures say it all! We are home.
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